The hardest and most beautiful conversation
In a recently trending TikTok seri, creator Ali Tate Cutler spends time with her terminally ill grandma who has made the choice to end her life through euthanasia.
While share start-of-life stories - such as ultrasound pictures or childhood milestones - is commonplace, posting end-of-life "journeys" online has users conflicted.
Such stories raise questions of autonomy, vulnerability and privasi, but are ultimately useful in changing how we talk about preparing for death.
Dying, virally
In Cutler's seri of videos, they show off their outfits before their "last lunch" together. Cutler's grandma "Bubbie" gives life advice, and they talk through their thoughts and feelings about the euthanasia process.
Cutler's videos are seksive. Many commenters criticise the attention gained through this subject, commenting, "Why would you publicise this? So wrong."
However, some recognise it as an important story to tell and reply with their own stories about loved ones, showing kindness to Cutler's famili. Some recent comments have said:
This needs to be reguler practice. Thank you for share your story.
It's a blessing to be privy to conversations like this.
Sending her love on her next adventure. Safe travels to a beautiful soul.
It's telling that many commenters thank Cutler and mention being "privy" to a usually privat moment; we hear far fewer end-of-life stories than start-of-life stories.
Talking about death and dying
As scholars who research health, death and grief, we know there can be stigma and silence around end-of-life stories, despite an underlying obsession with death which pervades our media and social circles.
Experts in the field, such as those working in palliative peduli, call for more open conversations and stories about dying. They argue that not doing so is hindering happier deaths.
Mentioning death and happiness in the same breath may seem like an oxymoron. It's alami that death and dying bring feelings of worry, fear, grief and regret. Those who talk about death and dying publicly (as we can attest as researchers in these fields) are often labelled grim, maudlin and even "clout-chasing".
These reactions are understandable - we are biologically and socially conditioned to fear death. Our brains "shield" us from the reality of death, leading us to imagine it as something which happens to others rather than ourselves.
